Aaron, Oooooccchh oooooooohh, I………want your bathtub.

I may have overreacted at the time, but I can handle the fact that you’re my father.

I can deal with having one of my hands lazer sworded off by you.

 It’s a bit weird we keep meeting each other on different planets and spaceships, but that’s ok!

I didn’t really notice or care that you destroyed my sister’s home planet.

I’m kind of annoyed that you chased me in your spaceship thing on the death star, but I kind of blew it up so I guess I win there.

I’m open to the idea of going over to the dark side, although you are a bit too clingy to the idea, and that old pervert emperor guy will be the first person I force lightning kill.

But never, and I mean never, touch my fucking bathtub.

End.

I’m kind of growing to the idea of Star Wars, very gradually. I’ve already made my feelings clear on Luke Skywalker in this post: http://aaronread.wordpress.com/2012/09/29/if-i-could-fish-slap-you-i-probably-would/

However I haven’t gone into my thoughts on Darth Vader. I favor him considerably more than any over lame character from Star Wars due to his final moment on film (not that ghost moment). When he took off his helmet to reveal that he is in fact……my childhood hero…….Dizzy the prince of the Yolkfolk!!

Now another poll to reassess the usefulness of it.

13 Responses to “Aaron, Oooooccchh oooooooohh, I………want your bathtub.”

  1. You have definitely outdone yourself!!! This is so great! Love Star Wars…this cracks me up! You know Vader does resemble that egg guy lol he was so pasty white too so maybe he was made of just the whites no yolk. So I see, your shwartz is as big as Vader’s (=.

    • Thank you!
      Haha I was expecting some egg jokes to be honest. But calling Dizzy ‘that egg guy’!! Shocking treatment of my hero! :P
      Indeed it seems that way! Remember he is more machine than man (a cheater) so mine should be seen more favorably.

      • Hmm looking at it* again your shwartz looks sort of wavery like…if your shwartz vibrates then advantage U!!!! Lord Vader…huh never that good in bed and what’s with all of that heavy breathing?? I mean I was the one trying to be subtle and fake it* lol =P.

      • And talk about being lazy, he doesn’t even summon the force to help him along! Theoretically he should be the biggest ladies man in the galactic empire, those blue women things should be queuing up for “a piece of Vader” (those things http://images-mediawiki-sites.thefullwiki.org/02/2/1/9/00335303567387986.jpg

        But let’s give him a break, must be kind of sweaty and icky in that suit of his.

      • Aawwww you have a soft spot for the evil one =P! Vader sweat? Hm. That could be the next big fragrance from Axe =)!

      • That’s why I’ve been following him during any of his physical activities with several hundred vials. My next creative pursuit is going to be smells in bottles. “Eau de la Force” will be first on the production line

      • Sounds fancy~♥!…but if I wear some will I then be able to move things with my mind or persuade you into doing embarrassing things lol =P…

      • Move things with your mind? absolutely!!
        Persuade me? perhaps not, look at the picture, does it look like I’m persuaded by Mr. Vader’s odor?
        But the embarrassing things I prone to anyway lol, so just keep a video camera near me and then you’ll have what you’re searching for!

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